We Aren’t Just What is Visible at First Sight – Understand Yourself (and Others) Better by Looking Deeper


It happens so easily that we simply see our emotions, thinking, feelings, and actions of the very moment, forming an opinion or judgment as a result of that. It also happens very easily to do the same with others. What we forget however is that we are not that transparent. Us humans are sensitive, deep beings and not as simple as many of us treat ourselves. It is so important to become aware of that. If we don’t, we will misunderstand ourselves (and others), treat ourselves unfair and judge too quickly.

I was inspired to write this post by the first essay I had to hand in for my Trauma Sensitive Yoga Teacher Training. I chose to discuss the complexity of diagnosis in psychology, specifically within the world of trauma. Diagnoses are highly influenced by a lack of time and distribution of power and money. As a result the assessment is sometimes done without the depth it would need and a diagnosis made, which might not have considered the full history of the person, but mainly according to what is easily visible on the surface. I believe that in this issue is a lot of learning for each one of us.

We live day by day without ever spending much time on getting to know ourselves. Emotional suffering, psychological problems and physical issues are often being suppressed and pushed away. Most do not invest any time in dealing with their history and looking at their self in depth. I am very much an advocate for living in the presence and understand that it strongly increases our well- being. Dwelling on the past is problematic. If however, we never engage with ourselves in depth, past experiences will influence us strongly and automatically without us being aware of it.

In order to be able to happily live in the present moment it is important to understand and be ok with what was. Who we are right now is influenced by everything we have experienced so far, starting from the moment we were created. Our history, with that our childhood and youth, our family and friends, and all experiences influence how we perceive the here and now and how we react to it. It also influences our relation to our self and how secure we are within ourselves.

Everybody wants to live a happy and fulfilled life. Some people work hard for it. It can be very frustrating when you feel like you have everything and you should be happy but you still don’t feel content. This is a sign that there is something missing inside of us on a deeper level. Imagine your self like a large vessel. This vessel is filled with different layers throughout our entire life. So the content is a mixture of all experiences. Sometimes there is a hole or crack in one of the lower levels of the vessel. So if we simply look from the top down without digging further it might seem as if it’s full and whole. In order to truly find out whether everything is ok we must dig deeper. This takes more time, but will eventually lead to us understanding ourselves on all levels, giving us the opportunity to fill or repair whatever needs care.

There are many different ways to get to know ourselves in depth and different things suit different people. We know ourselves best and with a bit of patience we will find the best technique or techniques. For some people therapy is the best form, for others yoga or meditation, some might prefer taking some time off by themselves and others chose to write a journal. There might be a completely different technique, which works for you or a combination of different ones. Any technique is great, as long as you find it helpful and dedicate time and effort to it.

Maybe days like these, which are full of fear and dissappointment, we can turn the be inspired to be good to ourselves and to the ones around us. Complaining and building up anger won’t lead to anything good. Allowing the negativity to inspire us to do something positive will.
xxx Sarah

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